The Procrastinator's Guide to Holiday Shopping

More than one-third of consumers have already finished most of their holiday shopping, a figure released by the American Research Group on Monday that's particularly irritating to procrastinators. Just because you waited until the last minute, however, doesn't mean you have to pay top price for the dregs of merchandise.

In an effort to reduce their inventories further, some stores are dropping prices as Christmas approaches, so it sometimes pays to wait. Still, it's a lot more stressful and shoppers are more likely to grab the first thing they see, regardless of price. Avoid overshooting your budget by following these six tips for last-minute holiday shopping.

1. Skip the Hottest Toys
The odds of finding a Nerf Vortex or a Sesame Street Let's Rock Elmo rank up there with winning the lottery. Even if you could locate the object of your child's most expensive affection, stores will likely have jacked up prices as they know shoppers are desperate.

2. Read Your Junk Mail
Remember all those merchant e-newsletters you receive throughout the year? Well this is the time to start reading them. Online retailers usually include coupon codes that allow you to score great last-minute deals.

3. Take Advantage of Free Shipping Day
It's not too late to order gifts online. Scheduled in its fourth year for Dec. 16, Free Shipping Day allows procrastinators to shop from over 2,000 merchants with free shipping by Christmas Eve. You'll find both big-name and small business merchants at FreeShippingDay.com, along with many great deals.

4. Keep Comparing Prices
Stressed shoppers will often pay whatever a retailer charges for an item just to cross it off their gift list. However, it's important to comparison shop even when you're in a hurry, which is why sites like PriceGrabber.com are so helpful this time of year. Simply enter the product name and the site locates a store near you with the lowest price. Better yet, get notified via FreePriceAlerts, a free browser download that updates you via e-mail or mobile app when your desired item drops in price.

5. Seek Out Free Gifts
Victoria's Secret is making 100,000 fans very happy with free gift cards given away on Facebook each day through Dec. 15. American Express cardholders who spend $25 or more at select stores are receiving a surprise gift by email through their "Gift Chain Program" (while supplies last). Keep an eye out for such special deals as they're all over the place this year.

6. Last-minute Lifesavers
The secret to successful procrastination is making it seem like you plan things well in advance. Gift cards are a go-to solution for anyone facing a last-minute gifting challenge, especially now that they're available in printable, e-mail and mobile formats from popular merchants. You can also find printable gift wrap for small purchases from sites like gift-wrapit.com for last-minute packaging.

About the Author: Andrea Woroch is a consumer and money-saving expert for Kinoli Inc.

How to Survive Holiday Gatherings and Avoid an Aneurysm Tough Love Author Shares Tips for Disarming the Debbie Downers

For those of us from families built on Debbie Downer DNA, there’s only one direction a mood can go during holiday get-togethers and that’s down.

Sure, the running negative commentary, bubble-bursting barbs and rampant self-pity were funny coming from comedian Rachel Dratch on “Saturday Night Live’s” Debbie Downer sketches. But few of us can foresee our own Negative Nancys giving us a good belly laugh.


Whether you’re the smiley face among frowners, or a bit of a Depressing Dan yourself, there are tricks you can use to keep the table talk from getting lethal, says Paula Renaye, a professional life coach and author of The Hardline Self Help Handbook, (www.hardlineselfhelp.com). 

“You can take control simply by thinking about what you choose to say – or not say,” Renaye says. “If you hear yourself criticizing, judging or complaining, you’re part of the problem. Happy, self-respecting people don’t find it necessary to dump on others to make themselves feel good.

“If someone else is the problem, simply don’t give them the ammunition they need,” she says. Instead try these tactics:

Do not say anything negative. Period. And no one-downing! One-downing is the opposite of one-upping. It’s the art of coming up with something worse when someone else talks about their problem. No matter what negative thing anyone says, or how much you agree with it or don't, resist the urge to respond with a negative. Instead ….

Dodge, distract and detour. Turn things around with a question -- a positive one. If you need to, make a “happy list” of questions before you go, so you’ll have some at the ready. And remember, there's no law that says you have to answer a question just because someone asked it. With negative people, it’s best if you …

Do not talk about yourself. The only reason negative people care about what you’re up to is because they want something to ridicule, brag or gossip about to make themselves look or feel good. Don’t go there. Whether you just filed bankruptcy or won a Nobel Prize, keep it to yourself. No good can come of it. None. And why do you need to chatter like a chipmunk about yourself anyway? Might want to think on that one, too. Better to find some praise for someone else than to expect someone to praise you.

Do not share your woes. Even if you’re in a tough place and could really use a shoulder to cry on, don’t start laying your woes on a Negative Nell. Even in a weak moment, when you’ve had a terrible day, talking about it with a negative person is a bad idea. You might get a microsecond of sympathy, but that’s only so they can launch into telling you how much worse they have it. So, no talking about yourself unless you want to be the talk of the party, the family and the town.

Do your homework and become like Teflon. Think of the times people said things that made you feel bad or made you feel the need to defend or explain yourself. If you want to avoid going down that trail again, start hacking away at the jungle of your own emotions. Get over needing anyone's approval or blessing. If you are still waiting for negative relatives to validate you, you’re in for a long wait. Don't set yourself up to be miserable. Get over it and go prepared.

About Paula Renaye

Former eggshell-walker, emotionally-bankrupt wreck and utter failure at keeping her world from falling apart, Paula Renaye uses her journey out of despair into joy as a breadcrumb trail for others. She has been a consultant for 18 years, holds a degree in financial planning with a background in journalism and psychology, and is a member of the International Association of Coaches. Paula is the multi-award-winning author of The Hardline Self Help Handbook.

Activist Gives Tips For Successful Volunteering

If volunteerism is a measure of someone’s passion, then Lisa Sellman’s knows no bounds.

Sellman, a professional dog trainer and owner of a pet care business, volunteers periodically with no fewer than 16 different organizations, with her activities ranging from working at an animal shelter to taking disabled kids on nature hikes during the summer. She is a community activist and lifelong volunteer, and she knows what it means to serve others.

"If you want to feel good, volunteer," said Sellman, also author of the children’s book The Legend of the Wolves of Gunflint Lake (www.lisasellman.com), which contains the theme of the value of community service.

"There are few ways to feel as good about yourself as volunteering. Now, I realize that many of us are wrapped up with work and family, trying to make ends meet, so the idea of volunteering can seem like it’s just another ‘have-to’ to write into the already crowded calendar. However, I know for a fact that if you do it right, it can be a great stress reliever and a source of true joy in your life."

The key to discovering that feeling is to let your passion guide you when you decide to volunteer, she added. Her tips for beginning volunteers include:

Choose Wisely – Many people get "roped into" volunteering for an organization because their boss is involved with a charity or a family member is working on a community project. Those can be rewarding ways to enter volunteerism, but only if the project is a match for your personal interests. The most important aspect to volunteerism is to find what you love, and direct your energies into a charity or community organization that matches those passions. If you’re an animal lover, work with a wildlife rescue mission or animal shelter. If you are a nature buff, there are plenty of environmental foundations that can use an extra set of hands. If sports is your thing, there are plenty of community recreation centers that need coaches for needy kids enrolled in their programs. No matter your interest, you can match it to a cause that needs help. Just pick the right one, and your volunteer time won’t be a chore – it will be a joy.

Watch Your Schedule – As much as you want your passion to direct your choice of project, you don’t want those volunteer projects to rule your schedule. Make sure you balance your volunteer time carefully so that your professional life and your family time doesn’t take a critical hit. Most organizations will take as much time as you offer them, but if you only have an hour or two each week, they’ll take that time, too. Your volunteer life should not consume your work or home life.

Have Fun – Helping others is its own reward, but it shouldn’t feel like a chore. Even the most mundane task can be fun if you manage it with a sense of humor and passion for helping others.

"You don’t have to spend a lot of time as a volunteer," Sellman said. "If everyone gave even just an hour a week, every community organization in the country would be turning volunteers away, because they’d have more than enough. The key is to understand that volunteerism doesn’t have to take over your life, and that if you do it right, it will add far more to your spirit than it takes away from your calendar."

About Lisa Sellman

Lisa Sellman is a professional dog trainer and owner of a pet care business who volunteers for half a dozen charitable organizations. She believes that community service is its own reward, a message that resonates throughout her children’s book The Legend of the Wolves of Gunflint Lake. The book encourages parents and children to discuss being of service in the community and how this can lead to lives of compassion and connectedness. (www.lisasellman.com)

One-of-a-kind Website Takes the Guess Work Out of Safety Parameters for Young Kids and the Web

It’s a moment many parents are apprehensive about. Our little one learns how to navigate the mouse and becomes interested in using it. Before we know it they are online playing games, checking out their favorite websites, and will soon start interacting with friends and family via email. As exciting as this is for children, it opens a whole new world of worry for moms and dads. We give our kids helmets and training wheels while they learn to ride a bike; it should be similar with the Internet given all of its potential dangers!

A one-of-a-kind website takes the guess work out of safety parameters for young kids and the web. Zilladog.com is a guarded 100% safe Internet portal and email system that can be used at home or in schools. If you check out www.zilladog.com and it’s easy to see why kids and parents love it. Besides giving kids all their favorite games, websites, movies and entertainment at their fingertips, the site has a bevy of safety features that protect kids from predators and protects the family computer from contaminated spam, spyware, etc.

Just some of the state-of-the-art safety components include:

No links to 3rd party websites, rather only links to sites that have been reviewed by its staff of parents. When clicking on a 3rd party link in Zilladog.com you are not redirected on the Internet, rather the link opens up safely within the Zilladog.com website.

Zilladog uses a parent-approved buddy system for its email and chat service. You need to enter a parent password to approve a buddy for your child. This means when on the Zilladog.com website, your child will only be communicating with people they actually know and who have been approved by you, the parent.

The site was designed to automatically filter out inappropriate spam and unsolicited email. If you give your child an email with Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo, etc. they can easily receive a link to a contaminated virus. We all know pop-ups are widely common when “surfing” the Internet!

You Are What You Eat: Ten “Clean” Foods to Always Put in Your Shopping Cart

When you make out your weekly shopping list, are most of the foods you go for in boxes, cans, or some other packaging? Are the foods packed full of ingredients that you can barely pronounce? If so, then you and your family might not be getting all the vitamins and nutrients you need to stay healthy. You may want to trade in those processed foods for whole foods and start eating clean, says Dr. Jonathan Wright.

“Think of eating clean as cleaning up your life,” says Dr. Wright, coauthor along with Linda Larsen of Eating Clean For Dummies® (Wiley, 2011, ISBN: 978-1-1180-0013-7, $19.99). “Just as you’d like to live in a house free of clutter, you need to remove clutter from your diet. That means throwing out the junk foods, refined sugar, additives, preservatives, trans fats, white flour, artificial flavors, and toxins that can be so prevalent in processed foods.”
 Essentially, the eating clean plan calls you to do the following:

• Eat the foods made by nature, not man.
• Plan to eat five or six meals and snacks throughout the day.
• Avoid processed foods (in other words, anything in a box with a label).
• Use healthy cooking methods.
• Eat before you become super hungry.
• Stop eating when you’re satisfied, not stuffed.
• Don’t count your calories, fat grams, or points.
• Enjoy and appreciate its flavor.

“Remember, eating clean is not a diet,” says Dr. Wright. “It’s a lifestyle. It does not include a complicated regimen that restricts entire categories of food. With fewer chemicals to deal with, your body becomes better able to concentrate on keeping you healthy.”

Read on to learn about the ten foods you should always include on your eating clean shopping list. These foods are great because they have many uses in the kitchen, they’re inexpensive, and they contain the most potent phytochemicals, vitamins, and minerals your body needs to be at its best.

Sweet potatoes are #1. The Center for Science in the Public Interest has ranked sweet potatoes as number one in nutrition, which is no surprise considering that these spuds are loaded with fiber, protein, complex carbohydrates, vitamins, potassium, magnesium, zinc, carotenoids, iron, and calcium. As a matter of fact, sweet potatoes have more than twice the recommended dietary allowance (RDA) of vitamin A, more than 40 percent of the RDA of vitamin C, and four times the RDA for beta carotene. And each sweet potato contains only about 130 calories!

“Looking for great meal ideas?” asks Dr. Wright. “Bake your sweet potatoes, slit them open, and stuff them with some low-fat yogurt or Greek yogurt mixed with tomatoes and celery. Or cut the sweet potatoes into slender sticks, toss them with olive oil and paprika, and bake them until crisp. There are many delicious ways to prepare sweet potatoes, but however you decide to cook them, make sure you always eat the skin! Most of the fiber is located in the skin, and the flesh right under the skin is highest in nutrients.”

Get fishy with wild salmon. Wild salmon contains high amounts of omega-3 fatty acids, magnesium, protein, and vitamin D. It’s also a great source of niacin, selenium, and vitamins B12 and B6. Eating salmon also helps prevent heart disease and diseases caused by inflammation. Scientists have recently found that omega-3 fatty acids can help slow the degenerative effects of Alzheimer’s disease and dementia. These fatty acids can also help lower the risk of depression and aggressive behavior.

“With all these benefits, it’s no wonder that many nutritionists urge people to eat foods like wild salmon twice a week,” says Dr. Wright. “Putting salmon on the menu twice a week can lower the level of triglycerides in your blood and can improve heart function. Remember, when you’re buying salmon, be sure to choose wild salmon rather than farmed salmon because the farmed fish can be high in mercury and toxic chemicals called PCBs, including lead and other heavy metals.”

Olive oil is the healthy way to dress up your food. You can use olive oil when sautéing foods, as the fat in almost any baking or cooking recipe, in salad dressings, and when frying foods. Most of the fatty acids in olive oil are omega-9 fatty acids, which are healthy monounsaturated fats that can help lower total blood cholesterol levels. Extra-virgin olive oil is made from the first pressing of olives, without heat, so it’s high in vitamin E and phenols, both of which are powerful antioxidants. And it has a wonderful flavor. Use it mostly in salad dressings and when briefly sautéing foods.

“When cooking with olive oil, remember that unrefined extra-virgin olive oil has a smoke point (the point at which the oil begins to break down and emit smoke) of about 375 degrees, which is slightly above the ideal temperature for sautéing or frying food but lower than the smoke points of other oils,” explains Dr. Wright. “So use ordinary (not extra-virgin) olive oil, which has a higher smoke point up to 430 degrees, for frying and long-sautéed recipes. Save the extra-virgin olive oil for salad dressings and baking!”

Don’t avoid cruciferous vegetables. What are cruciferous veggies and what makes them so great? Well, the category includes broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, Kohl-rabi, cabbage, kale, and bok choy. And many studies have found a link between eating these veggies and protecting the body from cancer. Specifically, phytochemicals in these foods, including sulforaphane, indole-3-carbinol, and crambene, help the enzymes in your body that destroy carcinogens before they can damage your cells. As an added bonus, these veggies are high in antioxidants, which help prevent oxidation and damage from free radicals.

“The key to getting the most out of these greens is in how you prepare them,” says Dr. Wright. “Be careful not to overcook them. Because they have a high sulfur content, overcooking them releases that chemical and gives them a very unappealing taste. Steam them lightly or eat them raw to keep your body (and your tongue) happy.”

It’s okay to be a little nutty. Did you know that nuts are actually seeds? Well, it’s true; any one nut contains every nutrient needed to support the sprouting and growth of an entire young tree! The many nutrients that nuts provide offer plenty of benefits to you, too:

• Essential fatty acids and monounsaturated fats: Help lower LDL cholesterol and reduce the risk of blood clots
• Vitamin E: Helps reduce plaque development in your arteries
• Fiber: Lowers blood cholesterol levels
• Plant sterols: Lower blood cholesterol levels

“Because nuts have so many health benefits and are so satisfying to eat, they’re a great choice for a healthy snack on the eating clean plan,” notes Dr. Wright. “The healthiest nuts include walnuts, almonds, macadamia nuts, hazelnuts, and pecans. Why aren’t peanuts on that list? Well, this may surprise you, but peanuts aren’t technically nuts! They’re legumes, just like peas and beans. Also, keep in mind that nuts lose many of their nonmineral nutrients to oxidation when they’re roasted, so eat nuts raw whenever possible.”

Clean up sandwiches and salads with avocados. Avocados are a rich and buttery treat, and—as surprising as it may be—they’re very good for you! These fruits are high in vitamins E, C, and K, potassium, oleic acid, folate, antioxidants, and phytochemicals (which stop free radical damage). The fat in avocados is monounsaturated, which means it lowers blood cholesterol levels. Plus, avocados contain beta-sitosterol, which is a phytochemical that also reduces cholesterol.

“Use avocados as a sandwich spread in place of mayonnaise or butter,” recommends Dr. Wright. “Just mash up an avocado with a little lemon or lime juice and spread it on whole wheat rolls or bread. Include avocados in your green salads, eat them plain as a snack, and use them to top burgers and grilled sandwiches.”

Go green and eat clean with these leafy greens. To get the most nutrients for the fewest calories, always put foods like kale, collard greens, romaine lettuce, spinach, Swiss chard, and escarole in your shopping cart. These greens are rich in vitamins and minerals, especially vitamins C, K, E, the B complex, potassium, and magnesium, as well as phytonutrients, including lutein, quercetin, zeaxanthin, and beta carotene.

“A diet rich in dark, leafy greens can help reduce the risk of atherosclerosis and heart disease, prevent diabetes and osteoporosis, and reduce the risk of developing cancer,” says Dr. Wright. “Eat the greens raw or cook them in soups and stews. Sturdy, leafy greens are delicious in stir-fry recipes, too. In fact, you can add leafy greens to a wide variety of lunch and dinner meals.”

Spice things up with curry powder. Curry powder is a blend of several different spices, all of which are high in antioxidants and phytochemicals. But the most important spice in curry powder is turmeric, which provides a yellow color and subtle rich flavor. Turmeric contains curcumin, which is a powerful phytochemical.

“People who consume a lot of turmeric-containing curry powder have lower cancer rates, lower rates of Alzheimer’s disease, less inflammation, and improved memory,” says Dr. Wright. “Curcumin has also been shown to slow the progress of prostate cancer. There are many delicious ways to incorporate curry powder into your meals. Sprinkle it on salads, use it in salad dressings, and add it to stir-fries and even your breakfast smoothie. You can find curry powder in mild and spicy blends, or you can make your own (just be sure to include plenty of turmeric!).”

Satisfy your sweet tooth with berries (especially blueberries). Berries are a wonderful sweet treat, and they make a delicious dessert all by themselves. Plus, they’re very good for you. Strawberries are an excellent source of vitamin C and contain phytochemicals that can help fight cancer. Blueberries, especially wild blueberries, are one of the healthiest foods on earth, with the highest antioxidant content of all fresh fruit.

“Dried berries have just as many nutrients as fresh,” notes Dr. Wright. “They’re higher in calories, though, because they have less water. Still, they make a wonderful snack when eaten in moderation. And don’t forget about frozen berries! These fruits are harvested at their peak and are often processed right in the field. Frozen berries can have more nutrients than fresh berries, which may have been shipped for miles. These fruits are also high in fiber, which can help you feel full longer and can reduce blood cholesterol levels. Add berries to green salads, fruit salads, use them to top your morning cereal, and eat them out of your hand as a tasty, sweet snack.”

Get to the root of clean eating with garlic and onions. These pungent root vegetables are good sources of allyl sulfides, which are phytochemicals that can help reduce the risk of cancer and calm inflammation in the body. These veggies are also high in polyphenols and flavonoids, which prevent oxidation and stop free radical damage. Garlic can help lower cholesterol levels, too.

“To get the most benefit from garlic, chop or crush it and let it sit for a few minutes at room temperature before cooking it,” says Dr. Wright. “Doing so helps preserve the allicin content, even after the garlic is cooked. Because the flavonoids in onions are concentrated near the skin, peel your onions as little as possible to get the most health benefits.”

“Even though these foods are the cream of the crop in terms of nutrients, fiber, and good fats, don’t limit yourself to these choices,” says Dr. Wright. “Instead, use them as a jumping off point. Experiment with new foods weekly to help you stay interested in your clean eating plan and to ensure that you’re getting as many nutrients as possible in every bite you take. Don’t be afraid to try new cuisines and new combinations, too. Combine leafy greens with curry powder, coat your salmon with chopped nuts before baking, and cook broccoli or Brussels sprouts with garlic and olive oil. The possibilities are endless!”

About the Authors:


Dr. Jonathan Wright, MD, America’s top holistic doctor, is the author of several books, publishes the monthly newsletter Nutrition and Healing (with a subscriber base of over 100,000), and hosts the radio show Green Medicine.

Linda Larsen is a nutritionist, recipe creator, and the author of 29 books.

About For Dummies®
After nearly 20 years and with more than 200 million copies printed, For Dummies is the world’s bestselling reference series, well known for enriching people’s lives by making knowledge accessible in a fun and easy way. Loyal customers around the globe agree that For Dummies is “more than a publishing phenomenon … [it is] a sign of the times,” [The New York Times]. The books span every section of the bookstore, covering topics from health to history, music to math, sports to self-help, technology to travel, and more. The For Dummies brand presence is further expanded with the addition of eBooks, a corporate custom publishing program, a robust consumer website, and a licensed product line that includes consumer electronics, culinary, crafts, video, software, musical instrument packs, home improvement, automotive, game, and more. For more information, visit Dummies.com. For Dummies is a branded imprint of Wiley.

4 Things Every Parent Must Know Before Purchasing the Latest Gadget for their Child this Holiday Season

If there's one guarantee for the coming holiday season, it's that the latest electronics will be at the top of nearly every child's wish list. Last year's most-requested item was the Apple iPad, and with the long-awaited iPhone 5 scheduled to land sometime this fall, it's likely that Apple will have another lucrative mid-winter gift season. Other manufacturers of popular electronics -- Samsung, Sony, Nintendo, Microsoft, Motorola, HTC, Nikon, Canon, etc. -- will not be far behind.

But parents thinking about microchip-laden presents need to do some homework first. There are four critical questions that you should be able to answer before giving Johnny or Jenny the latest gadget. First, what are the capabilities of the device? Second, what are the legal risks of using or misusing the device? Third, is Johnny or Jenny mature enough to understand those legal risks? and Fourth, are you comfortable with discussing those risks with your child?

The first question can be answered best by talking to salespeople, other parents who have bought the same device, and by doing some research online. The focus should be on understanding the types of information that can created by the device (photos, videos, texts, programs, etc.) and how that information can be communicated to others.

In most cases, the answer to the second question will be one of the following: cyberbullying, cyberharassment, or sexting (which in most states falls under the jurisdiction of child pornography laws). Make sure you understand the criminal laws in your state that cover those offenses and discuss them with a lawyer if you have any questions. You can't effectively discuss these risks with your child unless you understand them yourself.

Like many parents, you may be looking for a simple answer to the third question – when is my child mature enough -- but there really isn't one. Each child matures at a different rate, and you will need to carefully gauge whether your child is capable of understanding what types of behaviors are illegal. The bottom line is that he or she needs to be mature enough to not only to understand and respect the long-term consequences of violating school policy (or worse, state or federal law), but also mature enough to behave accordingly.

In many ways, the answer to the fourth question is the most important. If you are uncomfortable with the idea of discussing cyberbullying or sexting with your child, then it's both dangerous and unfair to give them a gadget that makes it possible to do either (let alone all of the other cybertraps into which children can fall). Keep in mind that a smartphone is not just a phone -- it's a world-wide publishing platform for information, and the consequences for misuse can be profound.

As parents, we put a lot of time, money, and effort into keeping our children safe and healthy. From car seats, to bike helmets, to swimming lessons, and driver education courses, we do our best to ensure that our kids don't get injured as they mature to adulthood. It's time that we starting taking similar care with the electronic devices they so eagerly desire.

About the Author:

Frederick Lane is an author, attorney, educational consultant, expert witness, and lecturer who has appeared on "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart," CNN, NBC, ABC, CBS, the BBC, and MSNBC. He has written six books, including most recently Cybertraps for the Young. For more information, please visit www.fredericklane.com.

New- Time and Money Saver

Launching this month - Build A Menu (www.BuildAMenu.com) is an online menu planning service that prepares weekly meal plans based on grocery store sales. The site does the work for you! Choose from weekly recipes and put together weekly menus using the Build A Menu calculator which gives a running total of your expected grocery costs – making it easy to control how much the family will spend on food each week! Just pick the store you want to shop, choose your meals and print your well organized grocery shopping list and chosen recipes.

Gadgets That Make Holiday Travel a Breeze

Talking on a cell phone while driving is dangerous. But a mid-transit chat pales in comparison to the distraction of driving with one (or two!) children wailing in the backseat. Nothing increases adrenaline and quick recall of four-letter words quite like crying kids.

As parents, we can mentally cope with crying kids to and from the grocery store. But long-distance trips need more finesse. Careful preparation and a few necessities can prevent a few glitches and keep your travel going smoothly. As you prepare for holiday travels, make the most of your trip with these handy gadgets.

1. Snack Container
A signature trademark of a kid-friendly car is a Hansel and Gretel-worthy crumb collection on every surface. If you can overlook this completely annoying parenthood perk, I applaud you; otherwise invest in some creative cups. Munchkin offers an ingenious design with handles and no spill rubber top--two for under $7. Sporting a similar design but with an attachable rope (and additional solid top) is the Spill-Proof Snack Buddy Cup from One Step Ahead.

2. Window Shade
Getting on the road is tough enough; stopping to shade a sunset shouldn't be on your list of priorities. Grab a light-cutting window shade to curb the brightness. Measure your windows and buy the widest shade possible, making sure you have enough visibility in your back and rear passenger windows. Check out your options at Great Baby Products for window shade reviews.

3. Lacing Toys
Kids above age 3 (who don't suffer from motion sickness) will work on lacing boards for hours. Growing Tree Toys has a fantastic range of simple lacing activities, like necklaces and ABCs, to complex connect-a-dot boards. Bring a bucket to set in your child's lap so that she can contain the blocks without dropping them on the floor.

4. Finger Puppets
For the dramatic types in your crew, a set of finger puppets can be a space-saving lifesaver. My favorite are high-quality puppets that tell a familiar story, like Thumbelina or the Frog Prince from puppet master Folkmanis, but folks on a budget can definitely afford IKEA's popular set of circus characters or animals for just $4.99.

5. Favorite Music
Not your favorite music, mind you. Junior may not appreciate the vocal stylings of Rihanna for hours on end (and, honestly, you shouldn't either). Enjoy some traditional Disney favorites and throw in some award-winning movement songs from Hap Palmer and Joe Scruggs to keep the mood kid-friendly. Bring on talk radio when it's time for a snooze.

6. Bubbles
So what if you have to clean up the residue later! Bubbles are total fun for all ages, especially when the road seems never-ending. Unless you have an older child, mom or dad needs to commandeer the liquid and blow them toward the back. The best bubbles on the market, hands down, come from Gymboree. These bubbles float forever and the solution never dries out.

7. Barf Bag
Close to 30% of people are susceptible to motion sickness, and kids are no exception. The barfies can strike at any time--there's no guarantee that your child will or won't get sick on a road trip. Prepare for the worst by investing in a few leak-proof barf bags with fun pictures printed on the outside and show your child how to "cough" into it if his tummy starts to hurt. And bring an extra couple of towels just in case.

8. Neck Pillow
This is a tricky one. Your younger child may or may not like the feeling of something so close to her neck. Try it on short stroller trips ahead of time to practice. If your kiddo will wear it, she'll be far more comfortable during naps. Pillow companions like the Dora neck pillow attach to the straps of your car seat or stroller, making it a bit more accessible.

9. Small Baking Sheets
This ingenious idea from Family Fun keeps the ever-present I-dropped-it-on-the-floor wail at bay. Use a conventional (but smaller) lipped baking sheet as a drawing, magnetic and keep-it-all-in-one place surface. Glue one or two layers of foam shelf paper on the bottom to make it less likely to fall and affix white contact paper to the top for the drawing surface. Turn it into multiple activities by attaching magnets to buttons for checkers or bingo games. Older travelers might prefer a more sophisticated travel kit like this one from Martha Stewart.

10. iPad
No, I'm not a fan of hours of screen time for little eyes, but during a road trip this godsend is a total catchall. From apps for all ages to music and movies, the iPad is the perfect device for tiny travelers. Purchasing gift cards at a discount from sites like GiftCardGranny can help you pay for the pricey device at such retailers as Target and Walmart, who are currently offering deals on iPad 2 bundles. Then, let your kiddos learn letters with Starfall or everything nursery-rhyme cooky from Duck Duck Moose. When all else fails, strap it to the seat and watch a movie. 


About the Author:

Ashley Grimaldo comes from a long line of penny pinchers and enjoys blogging on money-saving tips and advice for frugal-minded parents. She lives with her husband and three children in Bryan, Texas. Ashley has been featured among such media outlets as Redbook, The Chicago Tribune, Time.com, and CBS News-Houston.

Childhood Friends Leave Struggling Michigan Town to Fight in Afghanistan

“Deeply emotional. . . . a fine documentary by an experienced and talented filmmaker.”
— Robert Mackey, The Huffington Post

Following President Obama's announcement of executive action to help veterans of the U.S. armed forces, POV presents the U.S. television premiere of Where Soldiers Come From on Thursday, November 10th (check local listings).

It wasn’t long after Dominic Fredianelli, a sensitive, artistic high school graduate in a remote town in northern Michigan, signed up for the National Guard that his buddies started following his lead. In exchange for just one weekend of training a month, they would earn a $20,000 signing bonus and much-needed college tuition support. Before he knew it, 10 friends were in the group. They knew there was a chance that they’d be sent to war sometime during their six-year stint, but, as Cole Smith, Dominic’s best friend said, “I wasn’t really doing anything; my buddies had already joined. . . . I figured, ‘Twenty Gs, one weekend a month, let’s do it!’”
 


Thus begins director Heather Courtney’s new film, Where Soldiers Come From, which paints an intimate portrait of these friends’ four-year journey from teenagers stuck in Michigan’s Upper Peninsula to soldiers in Afghanistan. The documentary will have its national broadcast premiere the day before Veterans Day, Thursday, Nov. 10, 2011 at 9 p.m. on PBS as a special presentation closing the 24th season of POV (Point of View). The film will stream in its entirety on the POV website, www.pbs.org/pov/wheresoldierscomefrom, Nov. 11 – Dec. 11.
 
American television’s longest-running independent documentary series, POV is the winner of a Special Emmy Award for Excellence in Television Documentary Filmmaking,an International Documentary Association Award for Best Continuing Series and the National Association of Latino Independent Producers’ 2011 Award for Corporate Commitment to Diversity.


Shooting in vérité style, Courtney focuses on three of the friends — Dominic, who takes art classes and paints large murals in the abandoned buildings that belonged to a once-thriving copper mining industry; Cole, the comedian in the group; and Matt Beaudoin (“Bodi”), who has a history of military service in his family and is proud to serve his country. They change from carefree teenagers who spend their days swimming in Lake Superior and drinking at bonfires to soldiers getting hit by homemade bombs in Afghanistan and combat veterans dealing with traumatic brain injury (TBI) and post-traumatic stress disorder (ptsd).
 


Where Soldiers Come From starts in Hancock, the friends’ and Courtney’s hometown. The director films the guys and their families in their everyday lives, revealing the economic realities that contribute to their decision to enlist and creating poignant portraits of a community and its people.


“Where Soldiers Come From is an American story about growing up and trying to change your situation without privilege or resources,” says Courtney. “It’s about the people who fight our wars and the communities and families they come from.
 
“I felt it was important to follow these guys for a long time before they ever became soldiers so that the viewer would really know them and their families,” she continues. “For these young men and their loved ones, the war doesn’t end when they come home. I hope my film can help people better understand the war at home — the one that affects the parents, girlfriends and loved ones left behind when soldiers are deployed and the one that continues when they come back and try to start their lives again.” 
 
Where Soldiers Comes From is a production of Quincy Hill Films and ITVS.

About the Filmmaker:

Heather Courtney, Director/Producer

Heather Courtney is a director and producer whose documentaries, including award-winners “Letters From the Other Side” and “Los Trabajadores/The Workers,” have aired on PBS and screened at festivals worldwide. For her most recent project, Where Soldiers Come From, she returns to her hometown in rural Michigan to follow the lives of a group of friends before, during and after their National Guard deployment to Afghanistan. Courtney was named one of Film Independent's Top 10 Filmmakers to watch. She recently received the prestigious United States Artists fellowship and has received grants from ITVS and the Sundance Documentary Fund, among others.

Social Mom Lisa Marie's Weekend Suggestion: 3rd Annual Legends Tour Championship

If you are looking for an outdoor family activity that the whole family will enjoy, then plan to attend the 3rd Annual Legends Tour Championship at the beautiful Island Course at Innisbrook Golf & Spa Resort this weekend. Event activities will kick off on Tuesday, November 8th with golf clinics but continue all weekend through the main event, The Legends Tour Open Championship, on Saturday and Sunday.

Publix and Kraft Foods are co-sponsoring two new features this year. First, the Healthy Living Expo will feature a select number of wellness and lifestyle vendors offering advice and samples from 8am-4pm on Saturday and Sunday. Set alongside the Island Course, fans can also take a "Birdie Walk" and visit various checkpoints for vendor samples. Once they visit all of the checkpoints, fans can then redeem their passports for a free t-shirt at the Legends Tour merchandise tent. The Birdie Walk is open from 10am-2pm on Saturday and Sunday.

To announce the partnership between the Girl Scouts of West Central Florida and the Legends Tour Open Championship, several Tampa Bay area girl scouts participated in a golf clinic with players from the LPGA at the Innisbrook Golf Resort in Palm Harbor. Girls had the opportunity to learn about golfing basics, improved their game and asked questions of LPGA Legends Jan Stephenson and Dawn Coe-Jones. The Girl Scouts of West Central Florida is the official charity of the Legends Tour Open Championship and 100% of ticket proceeds will be donated to the Girl Scouts of West Central Florida. Tickets can be purchased at the gate. Children 17 and under and all military personnel with ID gain free entrance every day.

The weather is forecast to be wonderful this weekend so make plans now to get outside with your family!

For more information about the Legends Tour Open Championship, please visit http://www.thelegendstour.com/ and for more information about Innisbrook, visit http://www.innisbrookgolfresort.com/

S.A.F.E. TIPS FOR PARENTS AND TEENS DURING NATIONAL TEEN DRIVER SAFETY WEEK

Every seven days, 68 families needlessly have to bury a child before his or her senior prom and college orientation. If you divide the total number of hours in a year by the number of teen driving deaths, the outcome is one teen driving tragedy every two and a half hours in the U.S. That is why National Teen Driver Safety Week was enacted by Congress in 2007 and takes place the third week of October each year.

It’s a known fact that car crashes are the leading killer of youth, America’s most precious resource, ages 16 to 19, as more than 3,500 teenagers are killed each year on U.S. roads. In an effort to lower those numbers, Tire Rack Street Survival <http://www.streetsurvival.org/> , a national non-profit teen driver program, has committed to saving lives nationwide for nearly 10 years by teaching young drivers the skills they need to stay safe and ‘arrive alive.’

As National Teen Driver Safety Week kicks off October 16, Wade offers the following S.A.F.E suggestions for parents and teens on the road:

• Study the Basics: Teach your teen how to perform a quick vehicle maintenance check to ensure everything is working properly. Teen drivers should know where their spare tire is located, what to do in emergency situations and the importance of staying current with the oil change schedule, as outlined in the owner’s manual. Are the car’s tires inflated correctly? Is there sufficient tread depth on the tires to insure a safe stopping distance should an unexpected distraction occur? For correct tire inflation specs and for more tire-related information go to www.tirerack.com <http://www.tirerack.com> .
• Agree on Limits: Remember, your teen’s license is not about your convenience – it’s about his/her life.
• Set limits on your teen’s driving, particularly in high-risk situations such as prom night, social outings and especially in inclement weather.
• Do not let your teen ride with a young driver that has less than one year’s driving experience.
• Remember, the greater the number of teens in the car, the greater the level of distraction.
• Form a Plan: Have a clear understanding of where your teen is driving at all times, who he/she is riding/driving with and what route they intend to take. Confirm check-in times with your teen so he/she can provide updates to their plans.
• Establish a Backup: Sometimes teens make mistakes and get themselves into situations where other teen drivers have been drinking and they feel stranded. Make sure your teens have a responsible adult they can call, with a code word, if they feel they shouldn’t be driving, or are riding with another young driver who is driving recklessly or under the influence. Safety first, questions later.

“Having teens behind the wheel doesn’t have to be a terrifying occurrence for parents,” said Matt Edmonds, vice president, Tire Rack. If you prepare young drivers with the knowledge and training they need to anticipate and understand how to deal with dangers on the road and their vehicle’s capabilities, they’ll have a much higher chance of avoiding an accident.”

Tire Rack Street Survival schools are conducted by local members from regional chapters of the BMW Car Club of America (BMW CCA), the Sports Car Club of America (SCCA), Porsche Club of America (PCA) and others. The community-run program enrolls local students in neighborhoods across the country and teaches them to improve their driving competence by learning to control their vehicle through hands-on experiences in real-world driving situations in their own vehicles; all with an experienced coach at their side.

Community leaders or concerned parents interested in requesting a Tire Rack Street Survival school in their area can request one at www.streetsurvival.org <http://www.streetsurvival.org> or by calling (864) 329-1919.

About Tire Rack Street Survival®

Formed by the BMW Car Club of America Foundation (www.bmwccafoundation.org <http://www.bmwccafoundation.org> ), the Tire Rack Street Survival® safe teen driving program (www.streetsurvival.org <http://www.streetsurvival.org> ) was launched in April 2002. Tire Rack Street Survival® is built upon the premise that 'safe driving is learned by doing', and teaches students to avoid accidents by thinking and looking ahead. Tire Rack Street Survival® is unique in that it offers students instruction in their own cars so that they learn the limitations of themselves in their everyday vehicle.

Why Shouldn’t I Spank My Child?

Abuse Survivor Offers Tips For Alternative Punishments

Esther Joseph doesn’t need to read studies or statistics to understand the problems of child abuse. She survived it.

Joseph, an advocate against corporal punishment in the home, spent her childhood alternately suffering physical abuse from her mother and emotional abuse from her father. But she doesn’t consider herself a victim.

“I’m a survivor of child abuse,” said Joseph, author of Memories of Hell, Visions of Heaven—A Story of Survival Transformation and Hope(www.unityinherited.com). “In overcoming the damage of an upbringing riddled with violence, I was adamant that I would not grow up to be an abuser, as well. I know the dangers of striking a child to discipline them and then explaining that you’re doing it for their own good and because you love them. All that does is teach the child that violence is an acceptable part of love, and as they grow up, they accept violence in their adult relationships because they’ve been taught that it’s completely normal.”

Joseph believes that discipline is important, but that it can be delivered without making violence an acceptable part of life.

“No matter how out of control a child may be considered, a beating is never an effective way to get their attention, obedience or respect,” she added. “Parents must understand that there are other disciplinary measures, less violent and degrading methods that will garner the results they seek, while raising children to become emotional health and fulfilled adults.”

Joseph offered a few simple tips for alternative means of helping children behave. They include:

• Be a Good Example – Parents must live by example, allowing their actions and not just their words to exemplify the kind of person they would like their child to become.

• Be One Step Ahead – Don’t wait until your child has done something “wrong” to have a talk with them. Parents can circumvent many foreseeable challenges by addressing them before they become an issue.

• Be Creative – One type of punishment does not work for every child. Parents must figure out and utilize a form of reprimand that would work best for their child’s particular temperament.

“Every spanking, no matter how mild, has an impact,” Joseph said. “Parents should be aware that a spanked child becomes a emotionally crippled adult who goes out into the world and plays this handicap onto others, perpetuating the idea that abusive relationships are just a normal part of life. Now, I understand that people justify it by thinking, ‘I was spanked as a child and I turned out okay,’ but that equation doesn’t work for everyone. When we begin to justify violence as a part of our children’s lives, it becomes a slippery slope when we try to determine how much is too much? A spanking every once in a while? Using a belt or a hairbrush instead of a hand if a child is really misbehaving? At what point do you say it’s too much? The bottom line is that once is too much, because it makes a second, third and 20^thtime that much easier to rationalize. But for those who have been abused, no matter their pasts, it does not define them nor does it determine their future. Everyone can break the bonds of their past experiences and find their way to the life and future they crave.”

About Esther Joseph

Esther Joseph was born and raised on the tiny Caribbean island of Saint Lucia. She moved to the U.S. at the age of 16 with her mother and two older bothers. She holds a Master’s Degree in international affairs from New York University. Her goal is to help others still in the grips of abuse and violence to break the cycle and find a way to a place of healing.

Money Doesn't Grow on Trees

“Money doesn’t grow on trees.” This saying may seem obvious, although today’s youth seem to think the opposite. Who can blame them though – unlike the baby boomers the new generation of youth have grown up in a time of economic prosperity and are used to being coddled by their parents. In 2011 alone, over 85 percent of college graduates will be moving back home (Huffington Post).

Recently, the recent economic situation has shown us that anything can happen at any given moment and we (and our children) need to be prepared. Though it may not be possible to teach a pre-schooler the complexities behind 401Ks and credit cards, it is possible to start teaching children the importance of money at an early age. Chicago Healers Practitioner Julie Murphy Casserly (CLU, ChFC, CFP) stresses the importance of instilling good money habits in children as early as possible and offers easy conversation topics to address the issue at every age.

· Pre-School
Yes, money patterns begin to formulate during the pre-school years. You can start talking to your child about money when they are 2 or 3 by explaining that everything costs money – from the food they eat, the clothes they wear, to the house they live in. These talks need to go beyond the necessities too. Explain that new toys, accessories or video games are things your family can live without. Introduce new toys to them a few at a time, rather than showering them with an over-abundance of playthings. This will help them get used to the fact that they don’t need a heap of toys to be happy.

· School-Aged
By the time your child is 6 or 7 years old you can start teaching them about prioritizing their money. For example, when you are at the toy store, instead of letting them pick anything off the shelf, try giving your child five dollars and letting them choose something that fits within this price tag. For parents who buy their children anything and everything, the child will expect this treatment later on in life, giving them a sense of entitlement. Ask yourself, is this the reality I want for my child 15 years from now?

This is also the point in time to show your child that money is the result of hard work. Work out a plan with a family friend or neighbor where your child will do housework or yard work for $5-$10 cash. Then give them the power to choose how they want to spend or save their hard-earned money.

· High School
At this time, it is critical to create a financial collaboration with your son or daughter. Encourage them to get a part-time job to help pay for their car insurance, their gas or portions of the monthly car payment. Children should be held accountable for sharing some of these costs with their parents. Once they get that paycheck, establish guidelines on how it should be dispersed — 1/3 goes towards that car payment, 1/3 goes towards their future college fund and 1/3 can be spent on whatever they choose.

During this age, it’s also important to highlight the importance of living a quality of life, rather than the quality of things that you own. Help your children understand that material things like a brand new car when they turn 16, are often a source of immediate happiness, but sooner or later, this happiness fades and they will be left searching for deeper self-fulfillment.

· College
Your child is an adult now. Have an adult conversation with them about their finances and make sure they understand how credit works. Tell them about your experiences with credit card use – the good, bad and the ugly. Once kids are on their own, temptations will always arise and children in this age bracket will more than likely consider opening a credit card to fund some of these temptations. Explain how credit cards can bring a false sense of financial reality. They make us less conscious of where our money is flowing and how much we are spending. Talk about how the constant struggle to earn cash to pay off debt can take a physical and emotional toll.

Nature-Deficit Disorder: A Matter of Life and Health

By Peter A. Gorski, M.D., M.P.A. of the Children’s Board of Hillsborough County

“Our children are the first generation to be raised without meaningful contact with the natural world,” warns Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder, published in paperback in 2006 by Algonquin Books.  Sure they play on ball fields, skate through streets and manicured parks, learn about the Amazon rain forest and, on their computer screens and televisions, play in the heavens and get lost in the jungle.  Relatively few children today, however, spend much time aimlessly lying in the grass watching clouds pass overhead, wander free and safely out of sight of home or town, observe and collect tiny creatures (remember lightning bugs?), breathe in the aroma of fresh air, listen for sounds in the dark, learn the social behavior of wildlife or the signs of an immanent turn in weather.

Why should we care about such changes in the experience children have with nature? An increasing body of science and public concern claims that we had better reverse this trend if we are to endow our children with necessary skills to steward their own lifespan development, to promote community health, to guide the course of civilization and to safeguard the future of life on earth.   It’s amazing to learn how much natural exploration builds a child’s intellectual abilities, can prevent or treat attention deficits and can promote the development of personal responsibility, independence and relationship skills.

These are the subjects of Louv’s compelling appeal as detailed in his wonderful new book.  The 300 pages turn as quickly as did the patch of woods your community just converted to roads, condos or Walmarts.  Louv, a parent and journalist, has studied a growing body of research and interviewed leaders in the fields of environmental science, child psychology, community planning, health care and spirituality.  The book’s chapters first develop the case for concern on behalf of children’s mental, physical and spiritual health.  Subsequent sections account for the change in children’s relationship with nature and cite a number of hopeful programs, some educational, others community-centered and even faith-based, that, by reuniting children with the natural joy of discovery, are beginning to counter the potentially devastating consequences of losing contact with the natural world.   The book highlights practices that hold great promise, from schools that use nature as the anchor for learning all the academic subjects to terrific ideas each of us can do when we are spending time with a child.   The author’s own young son contributes one of the most endearing pieces of advice for adults:

Fishing Tips for Parents from Matthew Louv (age 12):
1. Fish with your kid.
2. Let your kids go fishing, even if you don’t want to take them.
3. Let your kids buy supplies and tackle.  That’s half the fun of fishing.
4. If your kids are young, take them to a place where fish are easy to catch and are small.
5. Let kids fish as long as they want.  Let them get obsessed.
6. Let the kids go off and do their own thing.  It can get to be incredibly annoying and/or frustrating if there’s an adult standing over them barking orders.
7. At least pretend to act excited when your kid catches a fish.  It can quickly ruin a day of fishing if the kid feels you don’t want to be there, and he’s just dragging you down.
8. If you know how to fish, don’t give your kid too much unsolicited advice, although it can be helpful if the kid is young.
9. Let your kid teach you how to fish; participate in the fishing.  This can be quality bonding time.
10. Remember that fishing and spending time with family is just as, or more important than, homework.
11. Have fun; that’s the entire point of going fishing in the first place.
12. And whatever you do, DON’T LET YOUR KID THROW ROCKS IN THE WATER!

Here’s the bottom-line message: early and enduring intimacy with nature may lay the developmental base for human beings to become more caring people, better scientists, moral politicians, community servants and devoted friends.  For all of us who raise or advise children and families, who care about the social health of communities and who recognize that time is short and responsibility for the well-being of children is both personal and shared, this instructive and inspiring book will become one of your most trusted resources.  Read it, share it and discuss it with your friends, colleagues and loved ones.  Send it to your local city planners and lawmakers.  Then go out and introduce some children to the magical mysteries and eternal truths of the nature we share with all living beings, the nature that produces life and shapes our destinies, the nature we must safeguard for our sake and for all time.  You couldn’t do our kids and their future a greater favor.

www.tbparenting.com
www.ParentingWithAngela.com