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Wednesday, April 4, 2012

City of Tampa Mayor Bob Buckhorn declares April 4, 2012 “Mary Lee’s House Day!”

In honor of National Child Abuse Prevention Month, City of Tampa Mayor Bob Buckhorn declared April 4, 2012 “Mary Lee’s House Day” at a special ceremony this morning at Mary Lee's House in Tampa. Mary Lee's House is a nonprofit child protection and advocacy center that has served more than 8,000 children and provided more than 14,000 individual services since opening their doors in November 2008. Mary Lee's House depends on the generosity of the community and is 90% privately funded. The Mary Lee's House Auxiliary was formed in 2011 and includes more than 200 dedicated community volunteers.

In addition to the proclamation presented to Mary Lee Farrior by Mayor Buckhorn, members of the Farrior family, Hillsborough County School Board Member Candy Olson and Colonel David Almand USAF praised the various child protection and advocacy programs housed in the state of the art child-friendly facility.





More than 200 guests in attendance included representatives from these partner agencies: the Crisis Center of Tampa Bay, the Children's Justice Center, Healthy Start Coalition, Success 4 Kids & Families, the Auxiliary ladies of Mary Lee's House and the Child Protection Team.



Mary Lee's House provides a child-friendly environment where law enforcement, child protection, prosecution, mental health, medical and social services personnel can work together to ensure that child victims of physical abuse, sexual abuse and neglect receive the services they need under one roof. The 30,000-square foot facility is the only one of its kind in Hillsborough and surrounding counties. For more information, please visit www.maryleeshouse.org.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

A Valentine’s Day Worth Remembering… Adopt a Real Manatee!

Manatee gift adoptions from Save the Manatee Club are a way to protect endangered manatees and their aquatic habitat, and also a way to let your loved ones see that your heart is in the right place this Valentine’s Day.

Jennifer Vogel, recently retired from a long career of practicing law, and who currently resides in Texas, adopted a manatee for her husband, John, last Valentine’s Day. “We had just decided to spend part of the summer in the Florida Keys so my two daughters could become certified scuba divers,” said Jennifer. “I have always loved manatees, and the whole family knew how excited I was about the possibility of seeing one on our trip. Adopting a real manatee was the perfect way to make our trip more meaningful.”

Thirty-three manatees are featured in Save the Manatee Club’s adoption programs, including two new manatees, Bama and Zewie, who spend the summer months in Alabama waters. Jennifer chose Brutus for her husband from the adoption program at Blue Spring State Park in Orange City, Florida. “The choice was easy,” Jennifer explained. “I loved the very macho name for such a gentle, giant creature.”

Tax-deductible gift adoptions from Save the Manatee Club cost $25 and include a color photo, biography, and adoption certificate of the manatee who is chosen. Also included is a fact-filled membership handbook, subscriptions to the Club’s official quarterly newsletter, The Manatee Zone, and the bi-monthly e-newsletter, Paddle Tales, and a year’s membership in Save the Manatee Club. A personalized Valentine’s Day gift card comes with each adoption, and shipping is free within the United States. An 8-inch manatee plush toy is included with every gift adoption of $35 or more

Funds from the adoption program help in the protection of manatees and their ecosystems. Save the Manatee Club is a 501(c) 3 nonprofit conservation organization, established in 1981 by singer/songwriter Jimmy Buffett, and former Florida Governor and U.S. Senator Bob Graham. This past year the Club assisted with rescue, rehabilitation, and release efforts in America and abroad; helped to expand and protect the manatee’s winter warm-water habitat; obtained improved boat speed zones in areas frequented by manatees; and conducted research on boater compliance in Kings Bay, Crystal River, Florida to obtain improved protection measures there. The Club raises public awareness; educates; advocates; and supports conservation efforts in other countries.

Patrick Rose, Aquatic Biologist and Executive Director of Save the Manatee Club, said that despite the immense problems facing manatees, there is hope. “As long as people continue to support strong manatee and habitat protection measures, manatees have a chance,” said Rose.

Jennifer Vogel and her family are among the many who advocate for the manatees. “The manatee is one of America’s treasures,” she remarked. “What I love about Save the Manatee Club is that they help you feel personally connected to the manatees through their real live manatee adoption program, and regular updates let you know how the manatees are doing.”

Care to adopt a manatee this Valentine’s Day? Visit Save the Manatee Club’s website at www.savethemanatee.org, or call 1-800-432-JOIN (5646). Also, sign up for the Club’s free E-Newsletter.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Soft & Safe Dino Bowling Set


I have a two year old and four year old that love this baby bowling set by Lakeshore Learning. They love to set up the soft stuffed dinos and knock them down with the balls over and over again. The pins and balls are covered in vinyl so they are easy to wipe clean. In addition to using the dinosaurs as bowling pins, they have become tea party attendants, puppets to entertain the baby and footballs. The set of 6 dinosaur pins and two large balls comes in a zipper tote for easy storage. The set retails for $14.99 at lakeshorelearning.com.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Social Mom Product Review: Dolphin Organics



As the New Year dawned, I considered making all sorts of life changing resolutions. Exercise more, get more sleep, eat more kale. Well, that last one might be a bit of a challenge. So, I took a different approach. Rather than overwhelm my family with goals that might not last through the first week, I decided it was best to start with something simple.

Switching out my daughter's regular shampoo and conditioner and replacing them with the Dolphin Organics Baby Shampoo and Conditioner was an easy first step. These products are organic, natural and endorsed by the Healthy Child Healthy World organization. The big question, would they work as well as my tried and true brands?

The short answer is yes. They are fabulous products! The tear-free shampoo lathers well and rinses cleanly. The conditioner is thick enough to coat the hair without weighing it down. These products are fragrance free but do have a slight scent. These and other baby care products are available online for about $12 each at Dolphin Organics. I recommend them and would purchase the Travel Set or Gift Baskets for baby shower presents.

If you're hoping to start the New Year off on a healthy path, the Dolphin Organics products are an easy way to go. Best wishes!

Submitted by Lisa-Marie, a Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine Social Mom, who is always on the go with a tiny tot in tow.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

"Love, Loss and What I Wore" at The Straz until January 15th



“Love, Loss and What I Wore” is a wonderful collection of stories that uses the memories that clothing and accessories trigger to tell stories that any woman can relate to. The all-star cast including Loretta Swit, who played “Hot Lips” Houlihan on M*A*S*H and Sonia Manzano who has played Maria on Sesame Street for over thirty years, stays seated throughout the show.
Although the actors don’t move very much physically, they definitely move the audience with stories about surviving breast cancer, losses of parents and children, relationships that don’t work and relationships that do. The show is not about fashion. It is about how our clothing tells a story about the children we were and the stylish adults we want to be. Some of the scenes had me laughing out loud and others I needed a tissue for. It was a perfect combination of humor and poignancy. One of my favorite scenes – “I hate my purse” really describes how I feel about every purse I have ever owned. I buy a new purse hoping that it will keep me organized and by the second week of owning it I can’t find anything in it so I buy another one and the same thing happens. Finally, I find one that works for me and it falls apart. I need to get a bag! Another favorite scene was shoes, which details the age old dilemma of comfortable shoes vs. sexy heels. I have to admit that I have owned many pairs of Birkenstocks and the less comfortable, more stylish shoes always win in the end.
I strongly recommend this show for all women. I am glad that I brought a girlfriend instead of my husband. I don’t think my husband would have appreciated how traumatic it is to get your first bra or why you can never find something to wear when you have a full closet of clothes. A close girlfriend always understands these things. The Jaeb Theatre at the Straz is a perfect venue for this type of intimate show. Get your tickets soon, the show ends on Sunday January 15th.

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Fireworks safety tips to consider this New Year’s

  • Stay Alert. Never mix alcohol with fireworks, sparklers and novelties.
  • Adult supervision. Never allow children to light or handle them.
  • Take Precautions. Always keep a hose and a bucket of water nearby in case of emergencies.
  • Let Sleeping fireworks, sparklers and novelties Lie. Don’t try to relight fireworks, sparklers and novelties that don’t ignite. Wait 15 - 20 minutes, then douse and soak them with water and throw them away.
  • Obey All Laws. Please obey state laws regarding the use of fireworks, sparklers and novelties.
  • Protect Your Pets. Animals are often frightened by the sounds of fireworks, sparklers and novelties. To protect your “best friends,” keep them indoors — away from the loud noise — and secure.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Legoland's Christmas Bricktacular and Kids' New Year's Eve


Although the presents have been opened, you can still savor the holiday season by taking a trip to Legoland Florida in Winter Haven. From now until December 31st, Legoland Florida is celebrating a Christmas Bricktacular. There are plenty of festive Lego decorations to admire as you "play your part" in Central Florida's newest theme park. Cheerful holiday music can be heard and snow falls throughout the day in The Beginning near The Market. There's even a nightly fireworks show at 7pm through December 31st.






The centerpiece of the Christmas Bricktacular festivities is a 30-foot tall Lego Christmas tree which is made up of over 270,000 Lego and Duplo bricks, shimmering lights and Lego ornaments. Even though it's amazing to see in the daylight, this unique tree really sparkles at twilight!

If you're looking for a memorable and fun way to ring in the New Year with the whole family, then be a part of Legoland Florida's first ever Kids' New Year's Eve event. Plan to spend the day riding the fabulous rides, watching entertaining live shows and movies, and eating tasty treats throughout the park. You can even take a leisurely stroll through the historical botanical gardens, build your own Lego towers in the Imagination Zone and see if your engineering skills stand up to a simulated earthquake.


The Christmas Bricktacular and Kids' New Year's Eve holiday events are included with park admission. For more information, please visit the Legoland Florida website at www.legoland.com.

Submitted by Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine Social Mom Lisa-Marie who is always on the go with a tiny tot in tow.

When Should Your Child Stay Home from School Due to a Cold?

-When is it appropriate for parents to let their child stay home from school?

Going to school can be very stressful for children. When children aren't feeling well, the stress of the school day can be too much. When children are ill, they are more tired, cranky and tend not to eat or drink. This sets them up to get further dehydrated and ill. To keep an illness from progressing, a day at home may be the first step. At home, caregivers can encourage a child to eat nourishing food like chicken soup, drink hydrating fluids such as water and rest.

-Is it better for your child to stay home so you don't get other children sick?

Keeping your child home from school is important for both your child's health as well as the health of their classmates and teachers. Children will exchange germs and get ill more frequently compared to adults. Many of the viruses that cause colds are airborne. Teach your children to sneeze into the crook of their arms and to cover their mouths when coughing. Then encourage them to wash their hands after coughing, blowing their noses and before eating. Also coughing onto toys can contaminate them and make others fall sick. Make sure your teacher is aware of your child's illness so hygiene precautions can be implemented at school.

-What signs or symptoms should a child have in order to be absent?

Some general rules of thumb to skip school include a fever over 101 degrees Fahrenheit, a severe cough, and nausea, vomiting and wheezing. These same symptoms also merit calling your pediatrician and arranging for a trip to their office. Other important signs of illness are rash and general malaise.

-Which cold remedy works the best?

Most physicians and the FDA no longer recommend cough and cold medicines for childen especially younger than age 2. For children older than 2, be wary of overdosing a child but using more than one remedy with the same ingredient. Children's Tylenol, Advil or Motrin can help with headache and low-grade fever. Always follow the directions on the label and from yur physician. Cold-EEZE zinc lozenges or oral spray are an effective way to decrease the duration of a cold. Studies from Dartmouth and the Cleveland Clinic have shown a decrease by 42% of a cold's duration. Zinc gluconate works best when started on the first day of symptoms so always keep some handy. Clean humidifiers also go a long way in keeping your child comfortable with their nasal symptoms. Keep you child well-hydrated. Unfortunately, the studies have fallen short in proving the efficacy of Vitamin C.

-Is there a way parents can prevent their children from getting sick?

Teaching your child good hygiene is the best prevention for staying healthy. Washing hands before eating or touching the eyes, nose and mouth is essential. A well-balanced diet, good hydration and rest are also important.

About the Author:
Dr. Yael Halaas, ear, nose and throat doctor. She’s been featured on round up/lifestyle and breaking news segments on The Doctors, FOX News and ABC New York.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Social Mom Product Review: Baby Polar Gear Booster Seat


We really like the Baby Polar Gear Booster Seat. It is stylish and very practical. It is so easy to attach to a kitchen or restaurant chair that my four year old can do it, although we check it afterwards. The five point restraint harness and adjustable straps keep your child safe. It is easy to clean, compact and lightweight. It is also very easy to fold up for transport. The chair retails for around $40 depending on the website.

Starting a Revolution with Hoes, Horses, and Healthy Habits: Seven 
Ways MindStream Academy Is Fighting Back Against Childhood Obesity


You’ve probably heard: One in three children in the U.S. is obese. It’s the issue of 
our time, and it seems to be getting worse. Learn what one unconventional school 
in South Carolina is doing to fight the epidemic…one child at a time.

“Obese” is not the word that should first come to mind when we think of the nation’s young people. Vivacious might be a good one. Creative, intelligent, and optimistic wouldn’t be bad, either. And yet, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, for 12.5 million young people in the U.S., “obese” defines them. When you consider how it limits the potential of so many kids, isolates them, and shortens their lives, you can see why childhood obesity gets so much ink these days. And yet, all the “awareness” in the world isn’t solving the problem, notes Dr. David Katz.

“Childhood obesity is the issue of our time,” says Dr. David Katz, a leading international authority on nutrition, weight management, and the prevention of chronic disease. “And while it’s too crucial a topic not to talk about, all the scary statistics haven’t been able to move the needle on this national epidemic. Grassroots action—taking one child at a time and helping him unlearn the patterns that led to his weight gain—is the only thing that works.”

MindStream Academy, for which Dr. Katz serves as senior medical advisor, is a case in point. A full-service boarding school on a pristine 43-acre horse farm in South Carolina, it helps teens and tweens who want to get healthy and fit, lose weight, take control of their lives, and build self-esteem.

It offers a positive, safe, and caring natural environment in which teens learn proven life skills that allow them to handle the stress and triggers that lead to unhealthy habits. In addition to working with a fully accredited middle school and high school curriculum, students get hands-on intensive and comprehensive health coaching, including nutrition, fitness, and behavioral interventions.

“MindStream Academy operates on the premise that being overweight isn’t just a physical issue,” says Dr. Katz. “It’s not just about eating more healthfully and exercising. It’s also about overcoming negative emotions, low self-esteem, social anxiety, and more. All of these factors play into the toxic cycle that leads to excess weight. That’s why MindStream takes the unusual approach of focusing not just on weight loss but on the ‘whole child.’ We take into account the mind, body, and spirit.”

In other words, MindStream provides its students with the skills and tools they need for a lifetime of healthy and happy living. Read on to learn more about its approach:

MindStream teaches sustainability instead of extremes. There is an avalanche of weight loss advice out there today promising quick results. However attractive these “quick-fix” programs may seem to desperate teens, most are either unrealistic for the average person or require unhealthful extremes. That’s why MindStream teaches its students an organic, sustainable way to lose weight by changing their lifestyles. And it’s why the program requires a semester minimum because it usually takes four months for the behavioral changes to stick.

“MindStream does not promote public weigh-ins, extreme calorie counting/restricting, or aggressive fitness regimens,” notes Dr. Katz. “My perspective on any challenging problem—and obesity certainly makes that list—is that we must both cultivate will and pave the way. Will power can start us moving forward, but only skill power will get us over the finish line. In that spirit, MindStream students learn to better manage stress. They learn to be mindful, to garden, to cook fresh wholesome and delicious foods, to enjoy moving their bodies (perhaps for the first time), and to appreciate the great outdoors—overall becoming more grounded to the earth. These are all the raw materials for physical, emotional, and social well-being.

“The causes of epidemic obesity are obvious and simple—we eat too much of all the wrong things, and do too little,” he adds. “The solutions are equally obvious and simple—we need to eat less and better stuff, and be more active. At MindStream there is nothing extreme about what we are doing. We just bring kids back to the basics. They put down their electronics, develop a relationship with themselves, their bodies, and the world around them, and start setting and achieving goals.

“Feet, forks, and fingers are the master levels of medical destiny for not just thousands, or tens of thousands on any one occasion, but the medical destiny of millions upon millions, year after year. We have known, but we have not managed to care. At least, not deeply enough to turn what we know into what we routinely do.”

It takes kids out of the virtual world and into the natural world. The way kids live these days is unnatural in the most literal sense of the word. It sets them up to become obese. It starts at school where physical education has been severely reduced or cut completely and where healthy food options lose out to pizza and soft drinks. After school, fast food and huge portion sizes abound. And kids spend long hours in front of the computer, playing video games, or watching TV rather than outdoors in physical activity.

“Throughout most of human history, calories have been scarce and hard to get, and physical activity has been unavoidable,” says Dr. Katz. “We applied our ingenuity to these problems and solved them. For most Americans, today’s food supply is readily available. We no longer have to spend energy hunting and gathering to put dinner on the table. We have devised technology that has made physical exertion not merely discretionary, but downright elusive.

“Today’s young people are disconnected from the natural world,” he continues. “MindStream unplugs their video games and computers, turns off the TV, and gets them moving. It gets their hands in the earth and teaches them a healthier way to relate to food. Students spend huge parts of their days breathing fresh air via fitness clinics held outdoors, walking around the campus lake, working with horses, taking lengthy bike rides. As they get back to nature, and to a more natural way of living, their minds, spirits, and bodies slowly become healthier.”

It provides a safe haven for positive change. Many obese teens come from negative school environments where they’re bullied and ostracized by their fellow students. They feel trapped by their weight physically, and those feelings lead them to be trapped socially as well. They often turn to a solitary, sedentary lifestyle where food is a comfort. MindStream takes them out of the world where they learned and developed harmful patterns so they can relearn healthier ones.

“Enrolling in MindStream is like pushing the pause button on a world that’s overwhelming you,” says Dr. Katz. “It gives teens the luxury of immersing themselves in a new way of life. Most of the food options we encounter in most places we go come in bags, boxes, bottles, jars, and cans—not peels. To choose well among these options requires a ‘how to’ skill set: how to read a nutrition facts panel; how to size up an ingredient list; how to see past banner ads and marketing hype to the truth; how to tell which of the dozens of choices in any food category from beans to breakfast cereal is worse for you, better for you, best for you.

“At MindStream, students have the time and the support they need to develop these life skills that will help them make healthy living sustainable. And they’re with peers who know exactly how bad it feels to be young and overweight. You can tell a young person to eat better and exercise, but if he’s in an environment that won’t allow him to practice these new skills until they become habits, it’s just wasted words.”

It helps teens address what’s eating them (psychologically, that is). Being overweight comes with its own psychological and social stresses. So does losing weight. Consider that when young people have bariatric surgery and experience dramatic weight loss, it isn’t uncommon for them to have an existential crisis. They realize they’re still the same person—with the same self-esteem issues, the same unhealthy relationship with food, the same stresses—they’re just smaller. If they can’t deal with the mental and emotional side of weight loss, they’ll never sustain it.

Neurobiofeedback is one tool MindStream uses to help them deal with stress. As part of MindStream’s comprehensive counseling (clinical, therapeutic) program, it retrains abnormal brainwave patterns through a non-invasive, psychotherapeutic, and behavioral technique. Basically, students learn self-regulation exercises designed to keep the psychological, neurological, and biological mind-body connection in harmony.

“We’ve found that this process helps teens learn to regulate dysfunction in their brains that can lead to compulsive, anxious, and depressive overeating behaviors,” explains Dr. Katz. “Neurobiofeedback is a fun, solution-focused, and non-threatening way for MindStream students to get their minds right, so to speak, at the same time they’re getting their bodies back on track.”

It uses equine-assisted psychotherapy to break down defenses and teach kids valuable new skills. Specially trained staff members set up activities involving horses that require participants to use creative thinking, non-verbal communication, and leadership skills to accomplish a task. Equine-assisted therapy is a fun, nonthreatening way for teens to develop problem-solving skills, resourcefulness, personal accountability, improved self-esteem, and more. And of course, they gain a new friend who loves them unconditionally.

“Horses can reach kids that no one else can,” says Dr. Katz. “We had one student who was depressed and possibly even suicidal until he began working with Louie, one of MindStream’s horses. The horse gave him a sense of purpose, and, ultimately, he ended up losing over a hundred pounds.”

It gives them tasks that lead to confidence and self-esteem. Overweight young people face bullying, name-calling, and endless small slights, both intentional and unintentional. In addition they are constantly bombarded with messages in magazines, television shows, ads, and movies that thinner is better and that it’s okay to make fun of and marginalize overweight and obese people. All of this takes a serious toll on their self-image. It’s MindStream’s job to build them back up—and that starts with giving them responsibilities that create a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

“Besides holding teens to high academic standards, leaders expect them to work in the ‘soul garden’ growing fresh vegetables,” notes Dr. Katz. “They harvest fresh plant food ingredients for the kitchen and work hands-on with MindStream chefs to prepare simple, delicious, natural, healthy meals. And they’re also responsible for feeding, caring for, and exercising the horses in the equine therapy program.

“If you don’t believe that you can make changes in your life, you’re probably not going to try,” he adds. “A lack of confidence causes you to stall out before you even begin. The work kids do at MindStream corrects that confidence deficit. When a teen sees that she is making progress in communicating with a horse and doing a good job as a caretaker or successfully prepares a delicious but healthy meal, her confidence grows…and she becomes more open to personal change.”

MindStream makes it a family affair. Young people cannot sustain weight loss if they do not have the support of their family. It is extremely difficult for anyone to continue making weight loss progress when those around them don’t or won’t make healthy living a priority. That’s why students’ families participate in the program through weekly counseling sessions via Skype, nutrition education, and weekend workshops.

“Let’s face it: It’s one thing to lose weight when you’re in a protected environment surrounded by professionals whose only job is to give you the skills to help you succeed,” says Dr. Katz. “It’s something else entirely to walk out of that haven into the real world and be able to continue living those changes. That’s why families have to change, too. And by doing so, we could eliminate 80 percent of all heart disease and strokes; 90 percent of all diabetes; and as much as 60 percent of all cancer. If they’re not part of the solution, they’re part of the problem. They must become a support system to assist the teen in his struggle to control his feelings, behavior, and weight.”

“Perhaps the most significant change that our students achieve is that they arrive feeling despondent and they leave feeling like new people,” says Dr. Katz. “The changes that are made here are not skin deep. There are tremendous shifts in personal responsibility, self-esteem, healthy risk taking, and the students also develop a sense of hope through accomplishing tremendous goals.

“A young person who comes here doesn’t just achieve a change in his physical form,” he adds. “The way he relates to his own emotions, his environment, and the people around him is transformed forever. And what he learns at MindStream will be with him for the rest of his life.”


About Dr. David Katz:
As one of the leading international authorities on nutrition, weight management, and the prevention of chronic disease, Dr. David Katz is in the trenches of the war against childhood obesity. In fact, he warned us many years ago that today’s younger generation will not live as long or as healthfully as their parents. Dr. Katz is also a prolific author, having published over 120 scientific papers, numerous textbook chapters, nearly a thousand newspaper columns, and a dozen books to date. In 2009 he was nominated for the position of U.S. Surgeon General to the Obama Administration by the American College of Physicians, the American College of Preventive Medicine, and the Center for Science in the Public Interest, among other national and international health organizations. He is also the founding director of Yale University Prevention Research Center, director and founder of Integrative Medicine Center at Griffin Hospital, president of Turn the Tide Foundation, Inc., and editor-in-chief of the Childhood Obesity journal.

About MindStream Academy:
MindStream Academy is a full-service boarding school on a pristine 43-acre horse farm in South Carolina for teens and tweens who want to get healthy, fit, lose weight, take control of their lives, build self-esteem, and pursue a personal passion.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Kids Can Learn to Control Their Lives 
by Controlling Their Money
Dropout-to-Millionaire Offers Tips for Raising Take Charge Children

As a teenager, Trevor Bolin was a drug-abusing high school dropout who weighed in at more than 300 pounds. He supplemented his meager income pumping gas by hauling possessions to the pawn shop, where he picked up just enough money for hot dogs and Kraft mac and cheese.

By 17, Bolin decided he’d had enough. He came up with a plan, and within two years, he’d quit drugs, lost more than 100 pounds, and was close to paying off $85,000 in debt.

By 28, he earned his first $1 million in one year.

And he did it simply by coming up with a plan and putting the plan in motion.

“My life has nothing to do with luck, good or bad,” Bolin, 32, writes in his new book, Take Charge and Change Your Life Today (www.bolininternational.com). “It revolves around working hard, giving back as much as (if not more than) I get, accepting that attitude is everything, and being grateful for what I have.”

He wishes he had learned those lessons long before he became an unhappy teenager with a seemingly hopeless future.

While many parents teach their children the basics of fiscal responsibility by giving them an allowance, Bolin says his experience offers less obvious but equally important lessons. Children need to have a healthy attitude toward money, not only to avoid making choices that make them unhappy, but to allow them a life path that they control.

“I learned my lessons the hard way,” he says. “You can start now to make sure your children never reach the bottom that I hit.”

These are some places to start:

• Avoid making negative comments about money: Sayings like “money is the root of all evil” and “a fool and his money are soon parted” are negative and therefore not helpful. Make a commitment, starting today, not to use those phrases. Imagine what a child believes about money if that’s what they hear all the time? 
Money is a great thing -- when you know what to do with it and when you control it rather than allowing it to control you.

• Help children recognize the financial lessons they learn from experience: Say you warned your child he should set aside some of Grandma’s birthday money, but he spent it all on impulse. When he’s disappointed later because he can’t buy something he wants, remind him why he can’t. Tell him that feeling disappointed is a small price to pay for a valuable lesson. And won’t it be much easier if he learns the lesson after just one sad experience? 

• Pay yourself first:If your child receives a weekly allowance, he or she should immediately put 10 to 15 percent into a savings account that won’t be touched. Or set a milestone for when money from the account can be used, such as the child’s 18th birthday. By then, she’ll be so accustomed to saving, she probably won’t tap the account even when she can. 

• Help your child set goals: Setting financial goals, noting progress toward achieving them, and enjoying the satisfaction of crossing them off the list are fiscally sound lessons and a good way to nurture healthy attitudes in general. Your child might set goals for the month ($10 to go to the movies), goals for the year (save $200 for a Wii system) and goals for the future ($375 a year for the next eight years for a car when I’m 16.)

“Goals are the first step in achieving what you desire in this world,” Bolin says.

“You can create success in any aspect of life – not just money – as long as you’re putting a plan in motion.”

About Trevor Bolin

Trevor Bolin owns three realty companies in British Columbia, including one in his hometown of Fort St. John, which was named the No. 1 RE/MAX small-density office in the world. He’s also chairman of Bolin & Co. International Training, which offers coaching and seminars for business people. He has served three terms on the Fort St. John City Council.


Thursday, December 22, 2011

Small Talk Made Simple: 
Five Ways to Help Your Kids Feel Comfortable Connecting

Small talk is an important skill for any connector, regardless of age, to master. From the check-out line at the grocery store to the person sitting next to you on a flight, you just never know which connection can result in something big or wonderful. When you look at it that way, every connection you don’t make is a potential opportunity missed, so engaging meaningfully is a skill that’s best learned early. Maribeth Kuzmeski, author of The Engaging Child: Raising Children to Speak, Write, and Have Relationship Skills Beyond Technology (Red Zone Publishing, 2012, ISBN: 978-0-9717780-3-0, $18.95), shares five strategies your kids can use to connect with people in any scenario this holiday season.

• Share something extra about themselves. When adults meet a new child, they’ll often ask easy-to-answer stock questions like, “What’s your name? How old are you?” In addition to providing the “bare bones” answer, help your children think of something extra they can offer. For instance, your son might say, “Hi, I’m Billy. I’m five years old and I love to play baseball!” Voilà! What might have been a standard teeth-pulling session has just been transformed into a bona fide conversation.

• Be complimentary. Whether you’re seven or seventy-seven, a compliment is always a great way to break the conversational ice. To get started, teach your kids to comment on something interesting the other person is wearing. For example, “I love that necklace you’re wearing. It’s so pretty!” Or, “Wow, your shirt is my very favorite color.”

• Talk about the weather. Sure, commenting on the weather has a rather “blah” reputation, but the fact is, it works, and it’s a great way to ease into a conversation with someone you don’t know very well. Teach kids to pay attention to their surroundings so they can comment on them during small talk. For example, “Have you been enjoying the nice weather?” Or, “I really hope the forecast is accurate, because I’d love a white Christmas!”

• Find things in common. If you can find a common interest with the person to whom you’re speaking, small talk can turn from mediocre to meaningful in an instant. Teach your kids to be aware of conversational and external cues. If your daughter notices that someone is wearing a Braves jersey and she’s also a fan, she can strike up a conversation about the latest game. Or if your son hears someone say that she’s from Columbus, Ohio, he might say, “My grandparents live near Columbus. Don’t you love the zoo there?” (Hint: If you are going into a situation and think of some common interests ahead of time, go ahead and arm your kids with them!)

• Wrap it up well. One of the trickiest parts of small talk is the conclusion. Give kids a few lines they can use to wrap up a conversation before it veers into awkward silence. “It was great to meet you. I hope to see you again soon! Enjoy your holidays.”

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Social Mom Product Review: Pat the Beastie, written by Henrik Drescher

Pat the Beastie by Henrik Drescher is now a favorite read in my house. My boys, who are 5 and 3, were attracted to this unique storyline from the minute they opened to the first page. It’s a modern day take on Pat the Bunny, written by Dorothy Kunhardt, which we had been told by our pediatrician to read every day to my oldest when he was a baby.

Paul and Judy, two wide eyed mischievous kids, basically torture Beastie, which at first, caused me to question the message in the book. However, in the end, nothing good comes from Paul and Judy’s behavior and as punishment for making Beastie suffer, they end up being eaten by Beastie. While the message was delivered in an interesting way, the underlying significance of the lesson learned is clear: YOU GET WHAT YOU GIVE or WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND or the ever popular, TREAT OTHERS HOW YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED. I did feel better knowing that Beastie’s friends were on the sidelines of each page sticking up for Beastie, warning Paul and Judy, and the reader, what could happen if Beastie continued to be mistreated.

What I like about this book is the interaction the boys can have with it. Each page allows them to participate in the story, for example, pulling Beastie’s hair, jiggling Beastie’s eyes, tickling his feet, playing peekaboo with Beastie and the absolute favorite, pulling Beastie’s worm boogers (see picture). Every night, when I ask the kids what book they want to read before bedtime, they respond with Pat the Beastie. Henrik Drescher clearly understands how to create a successful children’s book!

Written by Ellie Hirsch, founder of Mommy Masters and Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine Social Mom (http://www.mommymasters.blogspot.com)

’Tis the Season for Teachable Moments: Nine Ways to Help Your Kids (Politely!) Connect and Communicate This Holiday Season

Just like adults, kids are required to navigate a variety of social settings throughout the holidays. Maribeth Kuzmeski shares expert advice on how to help your kids behave appropriately and engage meaningfully with everyone from the grocery store clerk to Grandma and Grandpa.

“Aww, man! I wanted a new game for my Xbox, not another sweater.” Or, “…click…click…” (That’s the sound of a teenager texting instead of answering Aunt Debbie’s question.) If you’re a parent, you’ve been there at one point or another, and you know that a child’s social missteps—even if they aren’t purposeful or malicious—can be mortifying.

According to Maribeth Kuzmeski, the holiday season is when parents tend to notice most acutely which of their kids’ habits could use improvement—after all, friends and family are there to witness what you see as an embarrassing display that reflects poorly on your parenting skills.

“As a parent myself, I know that in the everyday hurry and worry of life, it’s easy to let your kids’ smaller foibles go uncorrected,” admits Kuzmeski, author of the new book The Engaging Child: Raising Children to Speak, Write, and Have Relationship Skills Beyond Technology (Red Zone Publishing, 2012, ISBN: 978-0-9717780-3-0, $18.95). “And once you’re in the midst of the packed holiday social season, it’s too late to correct behaviors you previously overlooked. The good news is, there’s no better time than now to take advantage of teachable moments, before all of those parties and gatherings begin.”

Giving parents the tools they’ll need to help their children develop a strong ability to connect with others is the focus of Kuzmeski’s latest book. It’s packed full of strategies and techniques that will teach kids to engage others meaningfully and productively, a skill that—according to research—plays a huge role in driving personal and professional success. As an added bonus, the last two chapters of the book are written by Kuzmeski’s seventeen-year-old daughter, Lizzie. They are meant to be read by Lizzie’s fellow teens and tweens in order to provide a peer’s perspective on the elements of building and maintaining real relationships in a wired and fast-paced world.

“My experience as a professional and as a parent has convinced me that one of the most valuable gifts you can give your kids is to teach them how to effectively engage with others in a variety of settings,” Kuzmeski confirms. “And the holiday season provides a wealth of opportunities to demonstrate and practice those skills.”

Kuzmeski recommends taking stock of all of the parties, pageants, and social settings you’ll be attending with your kids in the upcoming weeks, and deciding beforehand what habits and skills you’d like them to demonstrate.

“Don’t assume that your child ‘would never’ act in a certain way, or even that he or she ‘knows better’ than to engage in a particular behavior,” she advises. “Remember, kids don’t always know intuitively when they need to be on their best behavior, and they can’t ‘fake it’ as easily as adults can. The truth is, young people aren’t as disengaged and rude as we assume them to be—they just don’t always know the proper way to act. So start having these discussions now, not when you’re parking at Grandma’s house. And always, always be sure to model appropriate behaviors yourself!”

The more you practice good connecting skills with your children, the more they’ll become ingrained as habits. Here are nine holiday situations that Kuzmeski recommends using to instill productive communicating skills in your kids:

Teach them that sometimes it’s cool to unplug. One of the biggest complaints that adults have with “young people today” is that they’re always “plugged in.” To some extent, that’s true—email, social networking, text messaging, mp3 players, and more have radically changed the way this generation communicates and spends its free time. Now, technology isn’t bad in and of itself, but we all know that it can lead to disengaged and even rude behavior—especially at holiday gatherings. You’ll probably meet with some resistance, but it’s important to teach your kids when they need to step away from the keyboard, and why face-to-face interactions are the most rewarding of all.

“Place a basket at the door during any family event and collect all electronic devices before the mingling starts,” Kuzmeski suggests. “Include a note on the basket that reads, ‘So you can enjoy the friends and family you’re with.’ Explain to your kids how important it is to engage fully with people you love, especially if you don’t see certain individuals during the rest of the year. Point out that if they stay distracted by text messages and Facebook friends, they’ll miss out on fun and memories with cousins, grandparents, and siblings. Plus, kids need to understand that not giving others your attention is just plain rude…and that it won’t be allowed in your family.”

Arm them with ice breakers. For youngsters who spend most of their days “LOLing,” “BRBing,” and “TTYLing,” having a good old-fashioned verbal conversation might be unfamiliar, if not downright intimidating. Especially if your child isn’t a natural chatterbox, it might be helpful to give him a few ideas of how he can strike up a discussion with people he doesn’t see every day.

“Even before the days of smartphones and Facebook, it was completely normal for youngsters to feel reluctant to approach older adults,” Kuzmeski points out. “You’ll be doing your kids a big favor if you arm them with icebreakers that they can use to proactively connect. Before holiday events, discuss what some good topics of discussion might be and help them to make a list of strategies for drumming up conversation. They’ll also be able to power through any awkward lulls in conversation that might otherwise discourage them from taking the connecting initiative in the future.” NOTE to EDITOR: See attached tipsheet.

Explain the importance of expressing gratitude. We live in a “me, me, me” society, and even more than adults, kids tend not to think far beyond their own emotions and experiences. (Don’t blame them; much of it is biological.) During the holidays, that selfish hardwiring tends to manifest itself in a cursory “Thanks for my present!” before the child in question runs off to play with her new loot or rip open the next package. This year’s gift-swapping is a good opportunity for your kids to learn how to express gratitude in a much more meaningful way.

“Explain to your children before the first round of presents is handed out why it’s important to show gratitude,” Kuzmeski says. “Make sure they understand that each present represents the fact that another person cares about them and spent time and money to make them happy. Then, talk about meaningful ways to show gratitude. Perhaps it’s setting aside a few minutes after gift giving to say thanks privately to the gift giver. For example, your daughter might say, ‘I really appreciate the new coat, Grandma. I’ve been eyeing it forever and I can’t tell you how excited I am to finally have it!’ You might also suggest that your children keep a small pad and pen so that they can jot down what they received, and from whom. Later, set aside some time to sit down and write thoughtful thank-you notes together.”

Make sure they mind their manners. During a typical weekday dinner on almost any given day of the year, you might decide to let a muttered, “Eeew, this is gross,” pass without comment. After all, you’re tired from a long day at work and you really don’t have the desire or the energy to disrupt the meal with a lecture. However, the same under-the-breath comment at your mother-in-law’s Christmas extravaganza is the last thing you want to hear from your son. (And that’s only one of many potentially embarrassing situations that might crop up.) Therefore, take advantage of every opportunity to reinforce politeness and to explain why various behaviors aren’t appropriate.

“There are plenty of opportunities over the holidays for kids to practice their manners,” Kuzmeski points out. “Now, and as you start to attend various festive events, be alert for opportunities to remind your children what the appropriate thing to do is, and to help them exercise those ideals while they are still in the moment. For example, if your child cuts in line out of excitement while waiting to see Santa, reinforce that he needs to wait his turn, and explain to him that jumping ahead of others is disrespectful to them. Also, try not to ‘let things slide just this once.’”

Empower them while you’re traveling. Plenty of families pack up and hit the road to visit family during the holiday season. You may be tempted to handle everything on your own for the sake of convenience, but Kuzmeski asserts that this is a wonderful opportunity to empower your children by allowing them to navigate “adult” situations.

“Capitalize on all of the teachable moments that arise as you travel with your family,” she reiterates. “For example, let your daughter interact with the hotel receptionist and take care of all check-in aspects except the payment. If you need extra towels in your room, let your child call down to the front desk to request them. You could even let her call the airline’s automated number to double-check a flight time and status. When you accustom your children to these tasks early on, they’ll be much less timid and uncertain as they venture out on their own in the years to come.”

Help them to host an event. For most of us, the holiday calendar will be peppered with social events. Your family might even be hosting your own festive get-together. If that’s the case, teach your child the value of being a host and “working” his own party. If you’re throwing a neighborhood gathering, for example, go with your child as he travels from door to door personally inviting each family on your street. Assuming your guests live farther away, sit with him as he phones those to whom he’s closest and asks them to attend your soiree.

“Once the big event is here, have your child greet all of his friends when they arrive,” Kuzmeski instructs. “Then, ask him to keep an eye open to make sure that everyone feels welcome and included—while enjoying himself, of course! You can also help him to direct the flow of the party. (‘Now we’re going to play pin the tail on Rudolph!’ Or, ‘If you need more sprinkles for decorating your gingerbread man, just let me know!’) Lastly, teach him to thank all of the guests for attending as they leave. The fact is, many people don’t learn these skills until they’re adults, so you’ll be giving your child a major leg up.”

Help them connect at the cash register. ’Tis the season for shopping, and the fact is, if you want good service, you must first be a good customer. Learning the value of connecting with the people you do business with—from clients and vendors right down to the lady who checks you out at the grocery store—can mean better experiences for you and for them. While your kids won’t be pitching their company’s product or trying to compromise with a contractor for years to come, they can definitely start learning the skills that will help them do so.

“The next time you and your kids head out to the market or to the mall, help them figure out how to engage with store employees,” Kuzmeski recommends. “Suggest that they thank an employee who showed you where to find an item, let a manager know about a great service experience, or ask the cashier, for once, how his or her day is going.”

Make sure they deliver teacher gifts. It may seem silly to adults who have been conducting their own affairs for years, but personally delivering a gift to an authority figure—particularly a teacher—can be difficult for kids to do. Often, it’s a brand-new way in which to interact with this respected adult, and many children simply aren’t sure how to proceed.

“Instead of having your child leave a gift anonymously on her teacher’s desk, or even handing it over and racing away in embarrassment, coach her on how to deliver a gift in a meaningful way,” Kuzmeski says. “Don’t assume your child can wing it—create a script she can use to tell her teacher how much she appreciates her. She might even mention what she has enjoyed learning about the most. Also, tell your child to include her best wishes for a happy holiday season!”

Remind them to stay on their best behavior—especially in the presence of adults. As most parents are acutely aware, there are more than enough opportunities over the holidays for kids to be under the watchful eyes of adults who don’t normally see them. For better or for worse, it can feel like your success as a parent is up for debate. Yes, you’ll want your kids to behave for your own sake…but it’s also important to teach them that appropriate behavior, as well as right and wrong, don’t change from situation to situation.

“From parties to play dates to family gatherings, explain to your kids that even though they may not be directly interacting with an adult, that adult might still be observing and evaluating their behavior,” Kuzmeski says. “Tell tweens and teens especially that you never know which adult (whether it’s a friend’s parent, a coach, a teacher, etc.) might give you (or turn you down for) your first job or write a college recommendation for you. This concept will also hold true later in life—after all, an uncouth joke in the break room that’s overheard by your boss can have serious ramifications.”

“Ultimately, remember that there is no such thing as a perfectly behaved child,” concludes Kuzmeski. “You’ll probably hit some rough patches as you navigate the holiday season, but if you’re proactive about teaching your child to connect, they will be the exception rather than the rule. And remember, by helping them to grow into connectors, you’ll be giving them—and yourself—a truly invaluable gift this holiday season.”

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Tampa Bay Collection Sites Fill Up with Shoe Box Gifts as Web-Savvy Volunteers Pack Their Boxes of Hope Online

Volunteers have been working tirelessly at 16 Tampa-area collection sites where thousands of shoe boxes packed with school supplies, toys and necessity items were dropped off by caring Tampa Bay residents. National Collection Week is wrapping up for the world’s largest Christmas project of its kind—Operation Christmas Child—where participants fill empty shoe boxes with items for kids suffering from natural disaster, war, terrorism, famine, and poverty. Soon, these shoe boxes will be delivered to 8.5 million kids worldwide.

For families who haven’t yet packed their gift of hope, it’s not too late. Many local families are choosing to pack shoe box gifts virtually through “Build a Box,” an online giving tool. It’s a simple, quick, yet meaningful way to impact a child in need. Families can visit the project’s website at www.samaritanspurse.org/occ, select a child’s age and gender, shop through an online selection of gifts, “pack” them in an empty shoe box, and finish it off with a note of encouragement. Then through tracking technology, donors can "follow” the box to the destination country where it will be hand-delivered.

Operation Christmas Child, a project of international Christian relief and evangelism organization Samaritan’s Purse, uses simple gift-filled shoe boxes to let hurting children know they are loved and not forgotten. For many of these children, the simple shoe box will be the first gift they have ever received.

Since 1993, Operation Christmas Child has hand-delivered more than 86 million gift-filled shoe boxes to needy children in more than 130 countries.

For more information on how to participate in Operation Christmas Child, call 727-403-2109 or visit www.samaritanspurse.org/occ.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Sock Sac Review by Tampa Bay Parenting Magazine's Social Mom, Ellie Hirsch

I was so excited to receive the Sock Sacs for review, since I have had such issues with losing the kid’s socks in the laundry. There has got to be some secret place where all the random socks go…I just haven’t figured out where that is exactly? Until I do, my Sock Sacs will be my new solution!

The Sock Sacs is very light and not too big, which is perfect for a load of laundry. Once the socks are placed in the mesh bag, there is not only a zipper but a snap to keep the contents secure. When I took the bag out of the dryer, it was in perfect condition and all socks were still on board. I am not 100% convinced though that these socks were as clean as if they had been washed along with the rest of the laundry. I mention this, because there was a pair of socks that I missed that didn’t make it into the Sock Sacs and they smelled much fresher than the pairs in the bag. Even so, it was pretty exciting to be able to match every pair of socks in my son’s laundry for once.

In the end, I will be giving Sock Sacs a thumbs up because it is going to make my life easier, and as a mother, we need all the help we can get! FYI, I am thinking of making hand puppets with all my existing singletons, whom after 3 months of sitting by their lonesome selves, have yet to be reunited with their partners.


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Written by Ellie Hirsch, Founder of Mommy Masters and Tampa Bay Parenting Social Mom (http://www.mommymasters.blogspot.com)